Yay! We're #6!

For years, New York boasted the nastiest hotel room in the country. Now, at last, we've been beaten. (You gotta love that shower curtain.)

Things I Would Like to Own: Giant Doll Heads

The giant doll heads shown above were made for a recent hair show. (Read more here.) I think one might look AMAZING in my living room. (There's not enough room for two.)

People always clap for the wrong things.

J.D. Salinger, the author of Catcher in the Rye died this week. I was a twelve-year-old living in the mountains of North Carolina when I first read the book, and I'm not sure I realized what a lasting impression it had made on me until I was a junior or senior in college. A college in New York City, I might add, not far from Holden Caulfield's stomping grounds. Anyone who's ever read my Kiki books knows I'm not a big believer in coincidence.

I must admit, I wasn't terribly upset by Salinger's death. He was, after all, quite old, and we all have to go sometime. However, I was surprised to find how many journalists took the opportunity to give his legacy a kick in the pants. It's almost like they'd been waiting with copies of his books and a can of gasoline hidden behind their backs.

My curiosity piqued, I took the time to read a few online reviews of Catcher in the Rye. Here's one . . .

"J.D. Salinger's style is redundant, his characters are unlikable, and the unrealistic episodes our protagonist engages in reek of bad sitcom humor and denouements."

She's talking about a book that--like it or not--changed YA literature forever. Kinda puts things into perspective. We're all entitled to our own opinions. But it's important to remember that sometimes our opinions are wrong.

Ladies and Gentlemen (if there are any out there), I Need Your Opinions!

Below are three potential covers for my new book. I would love to hear what you think! Please be 100% honest. I didn't create them, so I'm not going to cry my eyes out if you don't like them! (OK, maybe just a tear or two. JK) Tomorrow, maybe I'll ask a few questions, but right now, I'm just interested in hearing what your guts are telling you.

(If you like one--or all--what do you like? If you don't like them, why not?)

Thanks!

Kirsten




Kidding! I've taken down the potential covers for now, but I will post the chosen cover as soon as I know what it is! Thank you so much for your thoughts and advice. You guys are the best!

Look Smart

Go to a school that uses video games to teach everything from English to history.

Make a magic phone call.

Master some of the tricks the CIA used during the cold war.

Use your discarded hair to save the world.

Learn how to collect tasty salad ingredients . . . in Central Park.

But don't worry if you can't spell. (You can add me to that list.)

Turn water into marbles (below).

The Buckshaw Beast

This is far more interesting than the Maine Ape, I think. The beast pictured above has been attacking deer around Buckshaw Village in northern England. Some witnesses say it's a cross between a boar and a wolf, while others claim that its movements are far too cat-like for a boar.

What the heck is it? Read more here.

Just In Case

If you ever design a time machine, you might want to put this poster inside it. Then give me a call.

(Poster designed by Ryan North. Available here.)

Non-Human Persons

Finally, science is giving dolphins their due. They are now recognized as the second smartest creatures on the planet. Smarter than dogs. Smarter than chimps. Smarter than three-year-old humans! Heck, they're probably smarter than most of the people I know! That's why some zoologists are arguing that they should be classified as "non-human persons." (Read more here.)

In all seriousness, I have a feeling that one day in the future, the human race will wake up and realize that there are many species that are far more intelligent than we ever imagined. Almost every day I read something amazing. Elephants mourn their dead. Chimps can learn sign language. Dolphins can not only learn amazing tricks--they can teach their friends, too. Pigs are plotting to take over the government of Liechtenstein. (Okay, I made that one up.)

So let's start taking dolphins (and other creatures) more seriously! If we don't there's always a chance they'll stop showing up to save our rumps (literally).

UPDATE: Video narrated by my personal hero, one of the greatest men who ever lived, Sir David Attenborough.

The Maine Tree Ape

According to the youtube description, this video was taken by a group of friends hiking through the woods of Maine. (Sure.)

As is often the case with videos of Bigfoot-like creatures, it generates more questions than the standard, "What IS it?"

I would like to know:

1. Why it didn't move.
2. What happened after the end of the video?
3. Why did some woman announce she was going to climb the tree?

What do you think?

The Mysterious Beasts of Antarctica

For years, the crews of Japanese whaling boats have returned to land with stories of strange creatures spotted at night in the freezing waters off Antarctica. Known as the ningen, the beasts are extremely long (up to 30 meters) and a pure, snow white. They're also said to have a human-like shape. And if they resemble the picture above (created by an artist), they're very, very creepy.

Read more and see pictures and videos here!

(They kind of remind me of the mook I have hanging on my wall.)

No Comment

Alma from Rodrigo Blaas on Vimeo.

They Call Him the Monkey King

This morning I found a video of a man in India who has all the makings of a parkour legend. I couldn't embed the video, so you'll have to view it on the youtube site. And I apologize in advance for the ad at the beginning. But the move this guy makes around the :35 mark is one of the most remarkable things I've ever seen.

P.S.: I wish there were a few more monkey queens out there.

Here's a video of some traceuses (as female practitioners of parkour are called) in action.

Just What I Needed!

(Above: That's how I felt yesterday.)

Thanks for sending me weird news! You guys are the best. I thought I'd share some of the highlights . . .

Will Russia save the Earth from a killer asteroid? (Thanks, AB!)

The world's biggest cave has been found in Vietnam. (Thanks, CS!)

What's the strangest thing a passenger has ever left behind on a train? (Thanks, EK!)

Take a peek at the comments on the previous post and you'll find lots more! (Thanks Trickster Queen, Anonymous, Amanda, Anonymous Weekly Bloggers, Rileydog, CA, Lioness, Anna, Gamma, Nellie, and all the rest!)

P.S.: Kiki, I found your link both weird and hilarious! But given the content, it's probably best to keep it between the two of us!

P.S.S.: AmberStarGem, I'm looking forward to reading your story!

I might as well add my own recent discovery to the list. Two NY high school students have identified a new (and extra disgusting) species of cockroach! Check it out here.

I Can't Take It Anymore!!!!!

It's too cold. This morning I went out for a bagel. I was gone for ten minutes, but it took my toes half an hour to thaw once I got back home. And I was wearing snow boots! I am miserable. I hate being stuck inside.

So I've decided to post this picture of the world's smallest horse. And here are some more photos of cute animals. They did absolutely nothing to cheer me up. Someone send me some weird news, ASAP!

Happy New Year

I hope the unexpected finds us all this year!

Japanese Giants

I know I've written about this subject before, but I thought this video was particularly interesting. I've always been fascinated by Japanese giant salamanders. Perhaps it's because North America's only giant salamanders can be found in the mountains where I lived as a kid. The Appalachian Mountain salamanders are called hellbenders, which has to be the greatest name ever given to a creature. Sadly, thanks to pollution, they may not be around much longer.

You Can't Hide from the Namahage

Allow me to introduce you to the Namahage. Three hundred and sixty-four days a year, these knife-wielding demons with a penchant for straw coats wander the wilderness on the peninsula of Oga in Japan. But every New Year's Eve, they leave their mountain lairs and go looking for a little human company.

The Namahage visit nearby villages, bursting into homes in search of lazy children. The head of each household must then negotiate with the demons (the negotiations apparently involve lots of sake) and attempt to convince them that the children of the house have been both hard-working and obedient.

If the Namahage remain unconvinced, the little boys and girls are dragged back to the mountains and forced to lead a life of drudgery.

Okay, now to my main point. The twenty-first century is a good time to be young. A kid today might squeal a bit at the sight of a Namahage or Krampus, but few would ever take them seriously. But go back a hundred years or so, and I'd bet that these demons were pretty good at scaring the snot out of children.

Imagine it. It's 1909. You're a kid in Oga, and your parents warn you that there are terrifying creatures called Namahage living deep in the woods. (And you can't go online to see if it's true.) Then on New Year's Eve, a hideous demon bursts through your door . . .

Merry Christmas

And I have a cold! I'm going back to bed, and I'm not getting up until tomorrow morning.

Yes, I'm Here

Reading your comments. Planning the perfect post.

UFO Hovers Over Red Square

Two videos taken by amateurs can be found here. Wow.

Is it real? Who knows. You can do some amazing things with a computer or two.

Octopus Wrestling

Want to know what your grandparents did for fun? According to the Wikipedia entry, Octopus wrestling was all the rage in the 1960s. (Really?) Divers would plunge into the ocean, grab an octopus and attempt to drag it to the surface. Anyone who took the sport seriously accomplished this feat without the help of an artificial breathing apparatus.

It wasn't easy. The octopus is stronger and smarter than one might imagine. (How smart? Click here. Thanks, Cailey!) Octopuses have been known to grab divers and hold them underwater until they drown. Still, I think one octopus wrestler took it a bit far when he declared:

I realize it all sounds like a loathsome sport but it’s really more fun than hunting some poor harmless creature. When you wrestle and kill an octopus, you’re ridding the marine world of a treacherous enemy. And you’d better watch your step, too. For there’s no such thing as a reckless octopus hunter. You’re either careful or dead.

A treacherous enemy? I find them rather cuddly!

Bleeding Bananas

I have tons of work to do today (yes, really), so I'm going to keep this short.

Bananas in New Zealand have started bleeding. Isn't that the fourth sign of the apocalypse? (JK!)

Check it out here.

Another Unnecessary Post

This may come as a surprise to some people (including you, dear Anonymous), but posting on my blog doesn't stop me from writing books. I am capable of doing both. Just like you are probably capable of showering AND finishing your homework. Or eating your Wheaties AND getting to class on time. Or writing testy notes AND flossing your teeth before bed.

In fact, in the course of writing this blog, I often come across interesting ideas, events, or images that later make their way into my books. Take, for example, the photo above. It's not the product of Photoshop. This is what people all over Norway saw a few nights ago.

Was it a Russian rocket spiraling out of control (as some have suggested)? An alien encounter? A sign from a higher power? Who knows . . . maybe the answer will be found in my next book!

The Shame of Hello Kitty

I could spend days and days blogging about Hello Kitty craziness. She pops up in some pretty amazing places these days. Like Hello Kitty sausages. Mmmm. Delicious.





But this afternoon I received an email from an associate (thanks JA) which directed me to this article.

Apparently police chiefs in Bangkok are now punishing police officers who break the rules by forcing them to wear Hello Kitty armbands. (Photo below.)

I'm conflicted. I find it amusing, of course, but I'm also just a little offended. Why is it so shameful to wear a cute pink armband?

Bag Lunch, Anyone?

(Art by Andrew Bell.)

This post is going to make lab-grown pork seem appetizing by comparison. Brace your stomachs.

Here's the first paragraph of an article published in today's USA Today:

In the past three years, the government has provided the nation's schools with millions of pounds of beef and chicken that wouldn't meet the quality or safety standards of many fast-food restaurants.

What does that mean? Here are a couple of the article's many revelations:

1. US schools are often supplied with meat from chickens so old that they would otherwise only be suitable for compost or pet food.

2. Schools can serve ground beef that contains high levels of bacteria that often indicate the presence of fecal contamination. (Yes, that is what you think it is. And it's not a good thing. At all.)

This is serious! Read more here.

It's That Time of the Year Again!

Each December, blogs all over the world seem to hone in on the very same subject. Krampus. This year, I've decided to join the fun.

So what's Krampus, you ask? Krampus is a hideous demon-like creature that originated in the deep, dark, desolate forests of Northern Europe. He's said to accompany St. Nicholas on the jolly man's gift-giving journeys (shown above). But while St. Nick hands out presents to good little children, Krampus gives bad kids a good kick in the pants (or much, much worse).

According to Wikipedia:

Traditionally, young men dress up as the Krampus in the first two weeks of December, particularly in the evening of December 5, and roam the streets frightening children and women with rusty chains and bells. In some rural areas the tradition also includes birching by Krampus, especially of young females.

Sounds like fun, right? (I never have to worry since I'm always very, very good.) It's hard to understand the allure . . . until you see a Krampus costume or two. A selection can be viewed here. Enjoy! (Actually, I find the old postcards a lot creepier.)

I Never Fully Trusted Tomatoes

I love tomatoes. But I've never really trusted them since I discovered (in the fourth grade) that they're members of the deadly nightshade family. Now, new scientific research has uncovered another terrifying truth about everyone's favorite salad ingredient.

TOMATOES ARE CARNIVOROUS!

That's right. Tomatoes eat insects. How? According to an article in The Telegraph . . .

Botanists have discovered for the first time that [tomatoes] are carnivorous predators who kill insects in order to "self-fertilise" themselves.

New research shows that they capture and kill small insects with sticky hairs on their stems and then absorb nutrients through their roots when the animals decay and fall to the ground.

It is thought that the technique was developed in the wild in order to supplement the nutrients in poor quality soil – but even domestic varieties grown in your vegetable patch retain the ability.

And they're not the only ones. Potatoes are also insect killers! In fact, according to researchers, "We may be surrounded by many more murderous plants than we think."

RELATED NEWS: Giant rat-eating plant found.

Sinister Suit-Sporting Rabbits Spotted in New York!

(Yes, I'm a big fan of alliteration.) Enormous rabbits wearing well-tailored suits have been reported throughout Manhattan today. And according to eyewitnesses, they're all as creepy as the one shown above. What's the meaning of this? Are they advertising a TV show as many have suggested? Or are the evil bunnies finally taking over--just as I have predicted they would lo these many years?

Giant Hamster Roams the NY Subway!

(Photos by Victoria Belanger.)

Little Edie is riding a subway model made for the trial of a subway bomber. (Her owner is an evidence photographer from the Manhattan DA's office.)

(via Gothamist)

Elsewhere in the animal kingdom . . . a real, living ouroboros!

The Sausage of the Future

It's been a while since this blog featured the kind of foul, disgusting, vomit-inducing post that you all adore. So I've been scouring the Internet today, looking for something that would turn your stomachs. And when I read the following headline, I knew I'd found it.

"Scientists Grow Pork Meat in a Laboratory."

Apparently lots of people have greeted this news with great joy. After all, lab-grown meat could feed millions, help reduce the greenhouse gases emitted by farm animals, and save cute little piggies from slaughter. (Even NASA is keen to know if meat can be grown in space.)

That's all great, of course. However, my interest started to fade when I learned that the research was funded by a sausage manufacturer. Which probably has NOTHING to do with the scientists' belief that their breakthrough "could lead to sausages and other processed products being made from laboratory meat in as little as five years."

Take your time, ladies and gentlemen.

Still hungry for more news?

Vanilla can be extracted from cow dung. Now how about some dessert?

The Life and Times of Lillian Mountweazel

(Above: Not Lillian Mountweazel.)

If you had picked up a copy of the New Columbia Encyclopedia published in 1975, you would have found an entry for a woman by the name of Lillian Virginia Mountweazel (1942-1973). According to her biography, Ms. Mountweazel was a fountain designer and photographer, best known for her collection of photos of rural American mailboxes, Flags Up!. She was born in Bangs, Ohio, and died in an explosion while on assignment for Combustibles magazine.

Pretty interesting lady, wouldn't you say? But the most fascinating thing about Lillian Mountweazel is that she never actually existed. She was what's known as a "fictitious entry." The publishers of reference books (dictionaries, encyclopedias, etc.) and maps will often include fictitious entries in their works. This makes it easy for them to know when their copyrights have been violated.

Thanks to good old Lillian, these entries are now known as Mountweazels. (In the world of maps, fictitious streets are called "trap streets." However, map makers' inventions have an interesting habit of becoming real places.)

That hasn't been the only honor bestowed upon Lillian. There's also a Lillian Mountweazel Memorial Society, and earlier this year there was an art exhibit devoted to her life and times.

Not bad for someone who never drew a breath. But it kind of makes you wonder what else might not be real.

Which US City Provides the Strangest News Stories?

That's right, baby. New York, NY!!!! A website recently analyzed over 2,000 strange news stories from 2009. Which cities produced the most? Here's the top ten . . .


1. New York City, NY
2. Lincoln, NE
3. Madison, WI
4. Philadelphia, PA
5. Chicago, IL
6. Cinncinnati, OH
7. Boston, MA
8. Detroit, MI
9. Dallas, TX
10. Pittsburgh, PA

Just a sample of the stories that came out of New York this year . . .

“Businessman accused of demanding dentures with gun”
“Turtles crawl on runway, delay flights at JFK”
“Goat wanders into nursing home in the Bronx”

I'm NEVER MOVING!!!!

Thanksgiving Ragamuffins

I have some serious weirdness for you this morning. I should have posted it yesterday, but I was too full of stuffing to move. (I LOVE stuffing. It's one of my top ten favorite foods. My Thanksgiving dinner plate is always 80% stuffing, 20% everything else.)

Okay, back to the topic at hand. Apparently, a strange tradition developed in New York City in the years between World War I and World War II. On Thanksgiving Day, kids all over town would dress up in their finest duds and most outlandish costumes and go from house to house shouting, "Anything f' Thanksgiv'n?" The homeowners were supposed to supply the annoying little scamps with money, fruit or candy.

The kids were called Thanksgiving Ragamuffins. According to one expert, "Ragamuffin parades, which harkened back to European traditions, were a chance for the poorer immigrants of New York to march through the streets in extravagant costumes, begging for change."

You see? It's this kind of thing that makes New York great. I've ALWAYS said that Halloween just isn't enough. Kids should demand TWO days of costumes and treats every year! Let's bring back the Thanksgiving Ragamuffins!

In the meantime, check out some Thanksgiving Ragamuffins from 1933 here, at the NYPL Digital Gallery!

Oh, and how about these pictures from an early Macy's Thanksgiving Parade? I LOVE that pig!

A Reason to Be Thankful

(Art by Kaitlin Beckett. Check out her Curious Bestiary! And yes--the illustration shows an ostrich, but let's all pretend it's a turkey, OK?)

My computer is back from the shop. For the last few days, I've felt like I was missing a huge chunk of my brain! Oh the joy! Oh the happiness!

I hope you all have a fantastic Thanksgiving! I'll try to come up with some awesome weirdness to keep you amused.

Here's the Scoop

There are a few questions I'm asked over and over again. (Don't worry, they never get boring. I'm flattered you care!)

1. Will there be a Kiki #3 and when will it be out?
2. Why has it taken soooooo long?
3. How have you been spending your time if you haven't been writing Kiki #3?

Today I'm going to answer all of these questions!

There will be a Kiki #3. It's called The Darkness Dwellers. (Though that title may change before it's published.) And it will (most likely) be out in early 2011. I know that sounds like forever, but in publishing terms it's just around the corner. (Okay, that probably didn't make you feel any better, did it?)

However, as I've told many of you who've written me, I PROMISE it will be worth the wait. Among the many questions the book will answer . . .

Will Kiki finally seize the throne of Pokrovia?
Why is Livia Galatzina bald?
Does Oona Wong really have an identical twin?
Why do fish forks exist?
Is escargot as delicious as it looks?
Are the catacombs beneath Paris anything like the Shadow City?
Who is Ananka Fishbein's secret crush?
Why is an executive from a pharmaceutical company following DeeDee Morlock?

It's going to be awesome. (Well, I find it entertaining!)

Okay, on to the next question. So what have I been doing with my time? Well I've been writing another book. It's called The Eternal Ones. It will be in bookstores next summer (and not just in the US)! It's for teens and adults, so I wouldn't recommend it for those of you who are under 14 or so. (Yes, I know. It's totally unfair. Sorry about that.) It's a dark romance/thriller about a girl whose visions of another life lead her on a quest to find her one eternal love. Along the way she encounters shadowy figures, secret societies, and a private security force known only as the gray men. (And yes, the figure shown above plays a key role in the book.)

I'll be posting more about the new book in the new year! Until then, I hope I've answered your most pressing questions!

Service Outage Alert!

(Above: Subway art. I took the picture on the way home from my computer's funeral. It almost made me feel better. Almost.)

So my computer just died. Tragic, I know. I've been having some terrrrrible luck lately. Unfortunately, that means the posts might be a little slow for the next few days. (What's new, right?) But I'll make it up to you. How? Tomorrow I'll post all the news you've been begging to hear.

School Controversy!

(I've come across the picture above a million times, but it still makes me laugh. The person responsible may not be very good at math, but s/he's a genius in my opinion.)

Okay, let's get a few things out of the way. I wasn't kidnapped. I was in the mountains of NC and my blackberry died. (Sorry, I should probably come up with a more entertaining excuse, but the truth will have to do for now.) As for the Shadow City Store, I closed it because I ran out of shirts just when my printer's machine decided to break! I'll try to have some cool new ones available before the next book is out!

Now. Time for a little controversy. A cash-strapped middle school in NC was recently in the news for all the wrong reasons. Seems the school's principal decided the best way to raise a little money was to sell grades. That's right. For a 20$ "donation," a student would be given 20 points which he could apply to his test scores. Wow. That's wrong for so many reasons that I couldn't even begin to count them. Though I do feel sorry for the school. Read more here.

Here's a story that's a little more complex. A teacher in Minnesota apparently broke the law by posting the names and grades of students who scored the highest on a recent test. He only wanted to reward those who did well and motivate those who didn't. But a parent complained that it was a violation of her son's privacy. Was it? Should posting the highest test scores be against the law? (Keep in mind--he didn't post the names of those who hadn't aced the test.) Read more here and let me know what you think!

Bomb-Proof Wallpaper

Hi everyone! Another post will follow shortly after this, but I couldn't wait to put this up. They call it "bomb-proof" wallpaper, but it seems to me that it might have plenty of other uses. (The most obvious? Wallpaper for buildings in earthquake-prone areas.) Awesome.

Window Farms

(Above: A Window farm and some cool street art. Photo by Britta & Rebecca)

One of the only things I've always hated about living in asphalt-covered New York City is that I haven't been able to grow my own special garden. Now, thanks to the geniuses behind windowfarms.org, I can! So everyone better be PRETTY DARN NICE to me from now on. (JK. Or am I?)

Animals in the Afterlife

(Above and below: Mummified baboons. Photos by Richard Barnes.)

In 1888 an Egyptian farmer digging in the sand near the village of Istabl Antar uncovered a mass grave. The bodies weren't human. They were feline—ancient cats that had been mummified and buried in pits in staggering numbers. "Not one or two here and there," reported the English Illustrated Magazine, "but dozens, hundreds, hundreds of thousands, a layer of them, a stratum thicker than most coal seams, ten to twenty cats deep."

That's a quote from the fascinating National Geographic article found here. All I can say is, "wow." Imagine finding hundreds of thousands of mummified cats in your garden. You'd never need to buy fertilizer again. (JK)

I knew the ancient Egyptians mummified their rulers and their cats, but until now I had no idea just how many animals they tried to take with them to the afterlife. They mummified crocodiles, rams, shrews, "even tiny scarab beetles and the dung balls they ate." Some of the animals were thought to be living gods. Others were just pets. And many were just food for the other side.

Check out the animal mummy photo gallery on the National Geographic site.

And What Did They Do With the Bus Driver?

(Photo by Plomomedia)

I lived in the mountains of North Carolina for seventeen years, but the first time I ever saw a raccoon, I was waiting for a bus in San Francisco. The odiferous beast (which was at least as big as a pit bull) appeared on the city sidewalk and cut in front of me in line.

Now I've discovered photographic evidence that the raccoons of San Francisco like to ride the bus. But these seem to have more than a pleasant commute in mind. Once they seized control of the vehicle, where do you suppose they took it?

Happy Halloween!

(Art by Richard Hinchcliffe.)

Anyone have any good Halloween stories to share?

Big Enough to Bite a Small Car in Half and Eat a T-Rex for Breakfast

This morning, my brilliant niece (an amateur paleontologist) directed my attention to a remarkable story on the BBC website. Seems a British fossil hunter made quite a discovery a while back--the skull of a sea monster so large that it would have considered the Loch Ness Monster a rather insignificant snack. (See above.) Read more--and see a video--here.

Cute and Strange

In parts of the world (like Northern Russia) where the sun disappears in the winter, kids are given UV baths. The ultraviolet light from the lamps helps the children's bodies get vitamin D--a nutrient that would ordinarily be provided by the sun.

And it makes for a super-cool photo.

(Photo from the National Geographic Archive.)