Wednesday, June 16, 2010

The New York Times Doesn't Know Jack About Rats





This morning, the New York Times reported on a new scientific study of the rats in New York's subway system. The article, while interesting, is riddled with inaccuracies!

Here are just a few of the mistakes I discovered! . . .

"City Hall is now aiming its technocratic lance at a problem so ancient as to predate the city itself: rats."


FALSE. The ancestors of most of the rats in New York were brought here on ships from Europe. They do not predate the city.

" . . . any New Yorker who has screamed at the sight of a hairy critter slinking along the tracks."

FALSE: No self-respecting New Yorker would scream at the sight of a rat on the tracks. If one did, he/she would be forced to leave town immediately.


"The legend of teeming rat cities tucked deep into subway tunnels is, in fact, a myth."

FALSE: Hahahahahahahaha! Fools.

"But befitting a creature that has evaded annihilation for centuries, officials found no obvious solutions [to the rat problem]."

FALSE: May I introduce you gentleman to a handy device known as the Reverse Pied Piper? Or perhaps you'd prefer a bottle of rat-repelling perfume?

“We’re no match for them, as far as I’m concerned. Man does not stand no chance.”


TRUE: Actually, men don't stand a chance against rats. Six delinquent girl geniuses? Absolutely.

19 comments:

Hazel said...

"Man does not stand no chance"?!?!? Okay, really? My eight-year-old brother can spot double negatives! Grammar fail, as well.

The Golden Eagle said...

Of course it's GIRL genii that can hold their own against rats. Who else? :D

montana irregulars said...

wow the new york times made a ton of mistakes! maybe the person who wrote this needs attacked by rats to knock some sense into him/her.

Je Reve said...

Can't we just pick apart the inaccuracies of modern non-fiction to poke fun? I am really loving this post.

Oh, and the roving shrub really did rock my world. Thanks!

MushroomCloud said...

and that's why I read the Wall Street Journal.Honestly.

MysteryJellyfish said...

I want to find the guy who wrote that, and slap him silly. Fools!

Kirsten Miller said...

MC: Does the WSJ have better rat reporting?

Kitty said...

lol XD

Clare said...

You should write to the NY times about this and include a copy of Kiki Strike, so they can get the real story!

EQ said...

Question: Who here agrees that certain rats may be smarter than certain humans?

NYT could use a good editor. "...does *not* stand *no* chance"? We're speaking English, ladies and jellyfish, not French. Double negatives are not correct. Kudos to Hazel for pointing it out!!!

It's not just NYC that has a rat problem. I saw one the size of a cat (no joke) run across our yard a couple months ago. They're gone now...or so the pest folks say.

Kirsten Miller said...

EQ: I believe the double negative was part of a quote from someone interviewed for the story. It wasn't the reporter's fault.

MushroomCloud said...

I've never found an article on rats in the WSJ Kirsten, but then again, if I've never found one they're not mis-reporting! :) I much prefer waater shrews over rats any day. I once found one in my canoe. I named it Wally. I think it's still there. Wegot a new canoe so he's not bugging anyone! :)

Lioness said...

i used to have absolutely adorable pet rats. i think they r absolutely the best rodent pet.... which becomes a problem on my frequent trips 2 ny wher i start talkin 2 them and people look like they want to push me onto the subway trax... :) pleasant new yorkers!

Kira said...

Wow, those people obviously never met the irregulars!
Just one question, though. Where is all of this rat information coming from? Is it a code or a hint about the next Kiki book??? Ooooh.... That'd be so cool!

Jin Ai said...

bahahhaaha
"No self-respecting New Yorker would scream at the sight of a rat on the tracks. If one did, he/she would be forced to leave town immediately."
I love the picture!

Poison Pen said...

I weep for the fate of the journalism industry. All we get is a "Man stands no chance against the rat menace of NYC?" Encouraging, folks. PUT A SPIN ON IT. Crude tricks like that aren't especially reserved for political buyouts, I don't see why people are so scared to use them for the common good.

And it's true, Man doesn't stand a chance. I was the sole Arachnid Assassin in my Biology Class that was 73% male and 97% athletic, and I'm a reasonably short, skinny white chick with no athletic potential whatsoever. Really.

Loved the dissection of the article's faults, by the way. Things like this keep the journalism industry humble!

Anonymous said...

"The legend of teeming rat cities tucked deep into subway tunnels is, in fact, a myth."
FALSE: Hahahahahahahaha! Fools.

So true! *highfive*

42 said...

:)

Anonymous said...

HAHAHAH! I like the last on. And "man does not stand no chance" really? that guy needs to learn how to spell.... I know I'm harsh