Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Groundhog Tries to Eat New York's Mayor!
(Above: The vicious attack! Photo by Irving Silverstein for the Staten Island Advance.)
THIS IS WHY I DON'T TRUST GROUNDHOGS! As you may recall from last year's Groundhog Day post, I consider groundhogs to be nothing more than evil, overgrown squirrels. Now I have proof.
Yesterday, New York's dear Mayor Bloomberg paid a visit to Staten Island Chuck (aka: Charles G. Hogg), the city's own weather-predicting rodent. But instead of offering his forecast and allowing the mayor to go his merry way, the nasty little fur ball decided to have a taste of hizzoner.
Thank goodness our mayor is blessed with superhuman speed. He managed to yank his finger back before the beast could unhinge its jaw and swallow him whole. (Okay, I made that part up.)
After the attack, Mayor Bloomberg was seen sporting a bandage on one finger. But all he would say to the terrified reporters was, “Given the heightened response against terrorism, and clearly in this case a terrorist rodent who could very well have been trained by Al Qaeda in Afghanistan, I’m not at liberty to say any more."
Read about it all here.
(PS: The nasty little rodent DID NOT see his shadow. And yet it's snowing like crazy right now. Like I said: DON'T TRUST GROUNDHOGS.)